He's back in the house, he's back in her bed, but all is not well, there's something about this time that reminds Nico of their first 'reconciliation', when Bill brought him here & made Jackie jam with him. Nico was always in doubt of his status, she'd make love to him with passion, speak to him with affection, but never said or did anything to indicate she meant for it to be long term, or who he was in her life. Before she learned about the affair, she was deep in wedding plans that are now completely abandoned, and Nico is as unsure of his place as he was when they first learned she was pregnant. What he has now is far more than he deserves, Nico knows this, and doesn't press for more, just makes the most of every moment he has with his family. Sometimes it's so beautiful, to hold them both in his arms, to see Jackie in his daughter's face, Nicolas almost believes everything is all right again. But he doesn't let himself slip into that kind illusion for long: he has a long way to go to prove himself worthy of this, to Jackie, to Trill & to himself.

Recording the CD, working on the songs that came out of her during their brief but seemingly eternal separation, is the best distraction for both of them. When they're working, they are always in perfect harmony, both committed to the music, and while their life is being consumed by recording sessions, their life is in perfect harmony. They are constantly exhausted, pushing themselves to the edges of their endurance, and Nico's ulcer is an irritating undercurrent, but he savors every moment for it's sweetness, for the beauty of creating something truly wonderful with her, something he could never have created without her.

Their first live performance of the new songs takes place the night of the release of 'Pink Hell'. Nico lives for the performance, thrives on the energy the audience sends up to the stage. Jackie is an amazingly powerful vocalist, brings a raw emotion to the performance that he strives to match with his guitar. These songs are all about him, about them & the awful mess he created of their lives, but Nico has no qualms about performing them, just as he had none about recording them: they're too good to be kept from the world just to spare his feelings. But as the song they're playing comes to a part where Jackie's really screams her pure seething anger at him, he sees her hesitate, looking at him with pity. Nico smiles, because he knows it's a sign of her love, and gestures for her to go on, letting her know he's ready for it. Jackie closes her eyes & let's go with it, and Nico can only be in awe of the sheer power of it, and try to keep up his part. When the band did their brief tour before Jackie's pregnancy was showing, Nico noticed Jackie's reluctance to talk up the crowd between crowds: back then, he was the new replacement guitarist, he wasn't sure enough of his place to step into the vacancies she often left in performances. Now, when the song ends & she stands still and quiet, eyes closed & head hung, in front of the mic, Nicolas leans into his mic and speaks to her & the crowd at once, "You're awesome, Jackie. Tell her," he adresses the audiences, "Tell her she rocks." It doesn't matter much what you say, Nico has learned after much gigging on the nightclub circuit, you call & they respond: the crowd roars for him. When Jackie opens her eyes, smiling & blushing a little as she meets his eyes, Nico speaks into the mic one more time, "I love you," eliciting another tremendous burst of sound from the audience.

After an uncomfortable photo shoot involving costumes he'd rather not be seen in, Nico meets Bill for lunch, at the CEO's insistence. "I was thinking, 'Pink Hell': pink instruments....you need to play a pink guitar guitar for the tour. What do you think?" Nicolas thinks it's bullshit & argues with Bill, who just keeps insisting it's 'genius' and talking like Nico agreed to it heartily. By the time the limo drops him off at the TV studio where the band will be doing a late night show appearance, Nico's ulcer is a searing point of agony in his gut. Of course he doesn't have his pills, he gave them Jackie to hold onto for him. She's at some TV interview across town, but will be meeting him here, the sooner the better. This is the longest they've been apart since then, and Nico already misses having her nearby, to be reassured she's still with him. He's arrived early & they show him to his dressing room, and Nico heads straight for the shower, hoping to wash the stress off him before he performs. When he comes out of the shower, towel in front of his eyes as he dries his hair, Jackie surprises him, wrapping her arms around his chest. "I'm so glad you're here angel," he sighs, speaking his native tongue, since Jackie is now fluent enough for him to not have to translate everything he says, "Do you have my pills? It's been such a crappy day, my stomach is churning." The hands on his chest squeeze tighter in an unfamiliar embrace and voice that isn't Jackie's says, "Oh, say that again, it was so sexy, Nico." Pure dread drops down on him as he realizes what's happening, some wench got into his dressing room while he was in the shower, hoping to get lucky with the rock star. Nico didn't ask for her & doesn't want her, all he can think about is Jackie, and how awful it would be to lose her over a mistake like this, if she were to walk in at the wrong time, and he pushes the girl toward the door. The door which Jackie is entering at that very moment. As soon as the girl is out of the room, Nico falls on Jackie with a pitiful moan, "I swear, I don't know who she was, I didn't ask her here," he pleas for her understanding. Jackie embraces him, soothes him & tells him she saw the whole thing, that it's all right, while he trembles in her arms, holding her closely, afraid to lose her. When he's calmed by her closeness & affection, she hands him his pills, which he swallows dry, desperate for relief from the burning.

The last thing Nico wanted was to be hiring a nanny for their daughter. There was no question that they would bring her on tour with them: wherever they go in this world, Trill is coming with them. But even having her with them isn't enough, there will be too many hours where Jackie & he will be working: performing, practicing, doing publicity, hours in which someone will have to attend to Trill. So they get Bill's help, experienced as he is with hiring personal staff like this, and start interviewing qualified applicants. All of them seem fine to Nico & at the same time, he wants to turn his daughter over to none of them, and agrees with Jackie when she turns down each in turn. All of them have been dour, serious, older women: when a young & perky applicant shows up, Nico expects her to be rejected before she gets halfway in the door. But Jackie is smiling as she interviews the girl, and when Jackie turns to him after the girl is gone, he can tell she's found one she likes. He's not especially attracted to the girl, doesn't see himself being tempted or flustered by her presence in his family on the closeness of the tour bus, but he is immediately conscious that with a nanny like this, he'd have to be constanly on guard to not even smile at the girl, because he needs to be not only guiltless, but also above suspicion, at all cost, if she's ever going to trust him again. "Are you sure you're okay with her?" he asks. "Because she's young & pretty?" Jackie asks with a raised eyebrow and a laughing voice, "I do expect you to not start banging Trill's nanny, Nico." He doesn't know how she can make a joke of this, it's the most deadly serious issue between them, this nasty little wedge he created. His ulcer chooses this moment to flare up, and Jackie's expression softens as she sees him wince with the sudden jolt of pain. "Nicolas, that's never going to go away if you don't forgive yourself," she says gently, caressing him, tucking her head under his chin. He puts his arm around her, holds her near his heart. "How can forgive myself for the pain I caused you?" he asks, the only possible response. "You did hurt me, Nico, a lot," Jackie answers, "But I'm not carrying that pain around inside me like you are. If I can forgive you, you can forgive yourself. I need you to, and Trill needs it, too. We're so good together, Nico, and I know you want what I want, to do this right & not be half-assed rock star parents that screw up their kid. You made one mistake, and you're making yourself pay double for it: I don't want to punish you, I want you back, I want us to be happy like we were before." Her words & her love are better than any medicine, her caress on his churning stomach soothes the searing pain. "What we had was so special: I betrayed it & don't deserve to have it back. But you do deserve it, Jacklyn, and I would do anything to give it to you," he says, kissing her hair. "I have it, Nicolas," she answers, pulling her head back to look up into his face, "We have each other, and we have Trill, we have everything we ever dreamed of in life & every reason to be happy. Didn't you tell me that once?" She smiles as she caresses his cheek, kisses his nose, "I was thinking we should finally hitch up already before we head out on tour, because otherwise who knows when we'll get to it," she finishes, kissing him, long, slow & tender on the lips. "Jacklyn, did you just say you want get married?" he asks, his voice cracking. "Yeah, we won't have time to plan much now, it will have to be fairly small, though I'm sure Bill will get some media there one way or another," she replies with a laugh, pulling his hair. Nicolas is beyond words, and just pulls her close, sinking his face into her neck, crying for joy.

Nicolas cries when he makes his vows to Jackie, and doesn't care that Bill has hired a film crew to document his most private happiness. He's wanted this so badly, nearly lost it through his own weakness & now, at last, it is truly his. The vows they make publicly here are the standard wedding vows: the vow Nicolas has made in his heart is much stronger, he won't take this for granted again. The beach wedding is followed by an informal reception. Andrea takes Nico aside & embraces him, congratulating his older brother's joy. "Nico, I was proud to stand as your best man," he says, clapping him on the back, "And now, I'm going to ask you to do the same for me: Debbie is pregnant, we're getting married." Nico's brow wrinkles in dismay, "Why did you go and do that?" he asks. Andrea frowns, then laughs, "It's not like I said, 'this time we're trying for a baby', Nico. It just happens. Like it's happened to every one of my brothers," he says pointedly, "I'm happy for you: try to be happy for me." Nicolas tries, but it bothers him, so he brings it to Jackie, who laughs at him, pointing out like Andrea did the hypocrisy of his discomfort. "Andrea's so young, he & Debbie have hardly just met," Nicolas says. "And how old were you when you knocked up your girlfriend & asked her to marry you?" Jackie laughs wryly. "I know," Nico sighs, "But we're different, Jackie. I just want what's best for my brother." Jackie smiles tenderly & kisses him, rests her hand gently on his stomach: his ulcer has gotten much better in recent weeks as his wedding day approached. "It's my wedding day," Jackie says softly, kissing his ear, "So, yeah, Nico, we're the most special couple in the world. But, realistically, I think Andrea & Debbie have as much chance at happiness as we have. And even if they don't, it's not something you need to be stressing over. Let it go, be happy for him." Nico buries his face in Jackie's hair, embraces her close to his heart, whispers to her how much he loves her, dropping his worry about his brother. "Listen," Jackie says, grinning up at him, "I was thinking we should ditch this lame party & go up to our room." Nico can only agree to her proposal, and finds his brother again for a few quick words before they head upstairs. "Congratulations, Andrea," Nico says, and is rewarded with a stinging clap on the shoulder, "Listen, brother, Jackie & I are going upstairs for a bit: cover things down here for me & I'll do the same for you when it's your turn."

They slip quietly away from their reception & into their bedroom. "Life is beautiful, Nico," Jackie murmurs, pressing her face to his chest as she embraces him. Life is indeed, beautiful, Nico thinks: he's always believed that, though he had that brief spell where it seemed like nothing but despair & darkness, but having come through has only made the new found joy that much sweeter. "You're my life, Jackie, and it is more than beautiful," Nicolas answers, sweeping her off the floor & into their bed.